Ganja Vibes Blog

Essentials to courtship, the Importance of an Orgasm & Serotonin-enhancing antidepressants

Impact of Sexual Side Effects

DO SEXUAL SIDE EFFECTS OF MOST ANTIDEPRESSANTS JEOPARDIZE ROMANTIC LOVE AND MARRIAGE?, PRESENTED BY HELEN E. FISHER, PHD

Do the sexual side effects of most antidepressants jeopardize romantic love and marriage? Dr. Thompson and I would like to say yes, most likely under some circumstances, but not always. Please don't leave this room thinking that we are opposed to the use of serotonin-enhancing medications. People are different; situations are different. The drugs have been proven to be effective under many circumstances. I'm an anthropologist, not a psychiatrist. What we're trying to do is to bring an interdisciplinary perspective to the table to heighten awareness and add to the dialogue so that we can all learn how to effectively heal our patients better.  
Since the release of Prozac (fluoxetine) in 1989, many similar serotonin-enhancing antidepressants have emerged. In fact, the use of these has increased dramatically. In 2002, in the United States alone, 213 million prescriptions for antidepressants were written and indeed most of them were for serotonin-enhancing medications. It's well established that these drugs can cause sexual dysfunction, diminished sexual desire, delayed sexual arousal, and muted or absent orgasm. In fact, some reports say that as many as 73% of patients on some of these medications can suffer from 1 or more of these side effects.  
We theorized that these sexual side effects can potentially -- not all the time, but potentially -- have some serious consequences due to the effects that they can have on several evolved, adaptive, unconscious neural mechanisms. These include the ability to attract a mate, to choose a mate, to fall in love, to stay in love, and to sustain a marriage.  
In short, it's all connected and when you knock out the sex system, you can jeopardize many other Darwinian mechanisms that evolved millions of years ago to direct courtship, mating, reproduction, and parenting.  

Distinct Brain Networks

In 1998, I proposed that Homo sapiens -- indeed, all of the mammalian and avian species -- evolved 3 distinctly different but related brain systems for courtship, mate selecting, reproduction, and parenting. The 3 brain systems I proposed are lust, attraction, and attachment.  
Lust is the libido, the sex drive; it's basically the craving for sexual gratification. W.H. Auden once called it an "intolerable neural itch"; Pablo Neruda called it an "eternal thirst" and an "infinite ache." It's simply the craving for sexual gratification; it often has no object. You can feel it when you're sitting in the subway, reading a book, or driving alone in your car; you can feel it really at any time.  
The second brain system is attraction or romantic love, also known as being in love, passionate love, obsessive love, or infatuation. This is the one that I've studied myself. My colleagues and I, and several others have now put 40 people who are madly in love into a functional magnetic resonance imaging (fMRI) brain scanner, and we've begun to see some of the brain circuitry of romantic love. I'm going to talk a little bit about that.From an anthropological point of view, this is regarded as a universal human phenomenon. In a study of over 150 societies, evidence of it was found in every single one; there was no evidence to the contrary. Everywhere in the world where you look for evidence of romantic love, you find it. Love magic, love poems, love songs, myths, legends, suicide, homicide, and reports from people themselves testify to it. Indeed, the hard data go back almost 4000 years to Sumerian poetry.There are several main traits of romantic love. I've canvassed the psychological literature of the last 25 years, and have, in fact, done a study of my own in Japan and in the United States. Of course we all know it, but here's what happens when you fall in love. The first thing that happens is that a person takes on what we call "special meaning." Indeed, George Bernard Shaw once said, "Love consists of overestimating the differences between one woman and another." Indeed! Then you focus your attention on this person. Most people who are in love can list what they don't like about their sweetheart, but then they sweep that aside and just focus on what they do like. As Chaucer said, "Love is blind." Also involved is intensely heightened energy, elation when things are going well, terrible mood swings when things are going poorly, and an intense motivation to win this preferred individual. There also is something that I call the frustration attraction: when there are real barriers to the relationship, like the person dumps you or they don't call or send you an e-mail or something, you just love them harder. In fact, in Roman times, people knew that phenomenon of frustration attraction.  
The most powerful characteristic of romantic love, however, is obsessive thinking. When we put these 40 people into the fMRI machine, the very first question that I asked my subjects was: what percentage of the day and night do you actually think about your partner? The response was 95%: I can't stop thinking about her or him, etc. So you have obsessive thinking, along with a deep dependency on this relationship, and more than any one other characteristic, a craving for emotional union with this individual.  
The third of these 3 brain systems that evolved from mating and reproduction is male/female attachment, associated with feelings of calm and contentment and a real sense of emotional union with this long-term partner. In people, as well as in other animals, you have nest building, or home building. Mate guarding is a term we use in anthropology -- I think in psychiatry you would call it jealousy. Finally, you have cooperative parenting, the main point of attachment.  

Primary Neurochemicals of Each System

Each of these systems is associated with different primary neurochemicals. Lust is well known to be associated with the androgens in human beings and certainly also with the estrogens in other species.  
From our study of the brain, we have some nice evidence that elevated activity of dopamine is involved in that intense sense of passion and arousal of romantic love. I also maintain in my book, Why We Love, that we're going to find out sometime that norepinephrine is also involved, largely because heightened activity of norepinephrine is also associated with focused attention, elevated energy, motivation to win a reward, elation, and 2 characteristics of romantic love -- obsessional following and object imprinting.I also maintain, although we don't have all the evidence for it, that low activity levels of serotonin are going to be involved, largely because the obsessiveness -- the obsessive thinking of romantic love -- is so striking. Indeed, low levels of serotonin are associated with obsessive-compulsive disorder. So that's part of the fingerprint of attraction or romantic love.  
Other scientists have done some very elegant work associating basic feelings of attachment with elevated activity of oxytocin and vasopressin.  

Distinct Neural Systems

I believe that each one of these 3 systems is a distinct neural system. In the last 3 years, 4 MRI studies of lust were conducted. Men and women were hooked up to a machine and shown erotic pictures followed by pictures of scenery, etc. In 3 out of those 4 MRI studies, researchers showed that the hypothalamus is involved, which you would expect, and 3 out of 4 have shown that the amygdala is involved. Two of the most convincing ones, I think, indicate that the insula cortex is involved, along with many other regions.  
Regarding attraction, or romantic love, what we found in our data is that the right ventral tegmental area is involved, along with the right caudate nucleus (dorsal). In fact, we showed a lot of deactivations, as one does prior to the brain turning off, while others turned on. We also found deactivation in the amygdala.  
On the left, the ventral tegmental area is shown becoming active when a person attached to the MRI machine looks at a picture of his or her sweetheart. This happens to be the anteromedial portion of the caudate. Several aspects of the dorsal caudate became active, which -- because the ventral tegmental area is involved, as well as dopamine and the caudate -- led us to believe that romantic love is not an emotion; it's basically a motivation system. I believe it's a basic mating drive that evolved millions of years ago. Indeed, I think that this drive is more powerful than the sex drive. You don't kill yourself when you don't get sex. People kill themselves when they don't get the lover that they are looking for, or they kill somebody else. slide018
Attachment, the third brain system, is not well mapped out yet; certainly the hypothalamic-pituitary axis would be involved because there's so much oxytocin and vasopressin in parts of the hypothalamus. The substantia nigra has a high density of oxytocin and vasopressin receptors, so that's likely to be involved. In a new study of mother/infant attachment -- not male/female attachment, but mother/infant attachment -- researchers found activity in the medial insular, the anterior cingulate, and the lateral orbitofrontal cortex. So as a matter of fact, many parts of the frontal cortex are going to be involved in all 3 of these systems because we think as we feel.  
The point is that each system is distinct; they have different feelings, they have different behavior patterns, and I think they each have a different role in human reproduction. I think the sex drive evolved to get us out there looking for really basically anything at all, anything that was remotely appropriate. Romantic love enabled us to focus our mating energy on just 1 mate at a time, thereby conserving mating time and energy. Attachment evolved to enable us to tolerate this individual, really, at least long enough to raise our children as a team.  
But I believe they are all primary mating drives; I think they vary from one species to another. A rat seems to show attraction for a very brief period of time; human beings can be in love for months or years. These systems certainly vary from one individual to another. Some people have a much higher sex drive than others. Some people fall in love all the time; others do not. Indeed they vary over the life course.  

Interaction of These Systems

The point here is that these 3 brain systems interact and there are many ways in which they interact, but I'm going to stick to just the positive relationship between the sex drive and attraction. You know the feeling, if you've fallen in love -- and everybody I would guess has been in love probably more than once. Suddenly the person that you're in love with becomes intensely sexually attractive to you. Three weeks ago, you didn't notice anything. He or she was a nice person; you liked this person very much. Suddenly, the way he or she moves or smiles at you is intensely sexually attractive. I think that this is at least in part because an elevated activity of dopamine and norepinephrine can stimulate testosterone, the hormone of desire. In short, the biology of romantic love can stimulate lust.Can the reverse be true? Can you be copulating with somebody who's just a friend and then suddenly fall in love with him or her? Not always. Most adults in the Western world have copulated with just a friend and have never fallen in love with him or her. I've got 4 middle-aged friends who either inject testosterone or use testosterone patches; they don't fall in love 36 hours after they've used them. But I do actually have 3 cases of friends who have told me that they have suddenly fallen madly in love with somebody that they were just copulating with as a friend. I don't understand the physiology of this, but I can report that, indeed, an elevated activity of testosterone does stimulate dopamine and norepinephrine. As a matter of fact, it not only stimulates dopamine and norepinephrine, but it suppresses the activity of serotonin, in short creating the ratio of monoamines associated with romantic love. This is one of the reasons that I say to my students: now don't copulate withpeople you don't want to fall in love with because it may just happen to you!  
The bottom line is that serotonin-enhancing antidepressants that negatively affect this sex drive can quite logically also negatively affect the brain circuits for romantic love.  
Serotonin-enhancing antidepressants cannot only potentially inhibit dopamine and norepinephrine, they can also blunt the emotions. This is why people take them; I'm certainly for that. If you're suffering terribly, it's the time to try to blunt the emotions. Nevertheless, they are going to have an effect on the elation of romantic love. Serotonin-enhancing antidepressants also suppress obsessive thinking, which is a very central component of romantic love. There are many examples of how these things are affected by each other. In 1 case collected by Thompson, a 20-year-old single white woman had an eating disorder. She was suffering from recurrent depression, she had attention deficit disorder, and she was taking high doses of serotonin-enhancing medication. When she was asked about the side effects of this, she said, "No, no, I don't have any." Then she said reluctantly to the doctor, "But I find myself wanting more space; there just isn't that much attraction." Romantic love is acentral aspect of human reproductive planning. It enables the human animal to focus courtship energy on avidly pursuing a particular partner and beginning the breeding process. When you inhibit this brain system, you can potentially -- not always -- inhibit the patient's psychologic well being and I think his or her genetic future.  

Evolutionary Inhibitions

Serotonin-enhancing antidepressants can inhibit other evolutionarily adaptive mechanisms for mate selection.  
One of them is orgasm; it inhibits orgasm and clitoral stimulation, but let's focus on orgasm. With orgasm, one of the main things that happens is that levels of oxytocin and vasopressin go up enormously in the brain. These are feel-good chemicals. They're associated with social bonding, pair formation, and pair maintenance. So when men and women take serotonin-enhancing medications and fail to achieve orgasm, they can fail to stimulate not only themselves, but their partners as well. This neural mechanism, associated with partner attachment, becomes a failed trigger.From a Darwinian perspective, orgasm also is a primary mechanism by which women unconsciously assess a mating partner. For a long time, anthropologists have thought that this is a bad design; women just don't have an orgasm every time. More recently, we came to realize that. We call it the 'fickle female orgasm' and we regard it now as a very serious adaptive mechanism that enables women to distinguish between those partners who are willing to spend time and energy on them -- those we call Mr. Right -- and those who are impatient or lack empathy and who might not be a good husband and father -- Mr. Wrong. When women take serotonin-enhancing antidepressants that inhibit the orgasmic response, among some of these women you're jeopardizing the ability to assess the commitment level of a partner. Women also use orgasm to assess existing partnerships; women tend to orgasm more regularly with a long-term partner. With the onset of anorgasmia, this can destabilize a match.A good example of this is once again a case study collected by Thompson, involving a 35-year-old married woman. She had recurrent depression and anxiety disorder. She was taking a serotonin-enhancing medication, which diminished her libido, and she had absent orgasm. She once apparently said, "I think I no longer love my husband." Then she switched to an antidepressant that had no side effects; her normal sex drive and normal orgasmic response returned and indeed she decided not to divorce her husband. She was thinking of divorcing him and now they have a small child. In this way, drugs can affect your biologic future. These systems are very old. Orgasm and clitoral stimulation are very primitive ways in which women measure men. Like drugs that blur your vision, serotonin-enhancing medications can potentially blur a woman's ability to evaluate mating partners, to fall in love, and to sustain an enduring partnership.  
These medications also inhibit penile erection in some men. We regard the penis as an internal courtship device; actually we call it an entertainment system, in my business. It is designed to attract and keep women. With no penile erection, a man has less of a chance of doing that. The penis also is regarded as a fitness indicator -- an anthropology term -- because the penis advertises medical health, psychologic health, and physical fitness. When men take serotonin-enhancing medications that produce impotence, the medications can cripple these vital courtship-signaling functions. Penile erection also has antidepressant qualities; this work comes from a friend of mine and his colleagues from 2002.  
The researchers looked at the contents of seminal fluid and, as it turns out, it contains dopamine and norepinephrine, associated with romantic love; oxytocin and vasopressin, associated with attachment; testosterone and estrogen, associated with lust; and follicle-stimulating hormone (FSH) and luteinizing hormone (LH), associated with regular cycling. Without orgasm, men are deprived of these courtship mechanisms. In fact, the same researchers also did a study of seminal fluid and found out that it actually does have regular antidepressant qualities. Those women who were directly exposed to it were less depressed than those who used condoms. I'm not recommending it; I'm simply reporting the data. But when men fail to ejaculate due to antidepressant drugs, they jeopardize their ability to adjust a woman's mood as well as to send important courtship signals. All male animals have evolved a host of courtship devices in order to capture females. Indeed, some of those most importantones can be jeopardized by taking antidepressant drugs.  

Psychologic Inhibitions

Serotonin-enhancing antidepressants can also inhibit psychologic mechanisms for mate choice.  
Motivation, discrimination -- deciding which person walking through a room is just more attractive to talk to -- and one's self-esteem all are important aspects of one's psychologic well being. The most interesting, I think, are the first 2. In the case of motivation, in one study, a 25-year-old man had had some long-term intimate successful relationships with women. He recounted having a panic disorder and taking serotonin-enhancing medications, and reported that he "just stopped dating."  
In another very interesting study, Fisher reported that she was interested in knowing whether serotonin-enhancing medications could actually make a change in unconscious psychologic mechanisms that we use to look at a room of people and decide who is or is not attractive to us. She asked 20 women who were on serotonin-enhancing medications and 20 women who were on no medications to sit in front of a computer and rate the faces of men. Those women who were on the selective serotonin reuptake inhibitors (SSRIs) rated the male faces as more unattractive and also looked at and appraised the faces for a shorter period of time. I don't know if it's her term or not, but she called it 'courtship blunting.' There seemed to be any number of examples of this. In one case, a 54-year-old man in the healthcare business reported, after using serotonin-enhancing antidepressants, "It's like the lens I use to look at the world has been changed." A 45-year-old married woman said, "It's like being handicapped; like being blind."  
This reads, "Brad, talk to me -- animal to animal." We are animals. As one psychiatrist once wrote: one of the relics of early man is modern man. The brain is built in many ways to aid reproduction and I think we might find many ways in which serotonin-enhancing antidepressants and perhaps many other drugs subtly affect the way men and women discriminate between mates, choose mates, feel romantic love, and feel marital attachment.  

Adaptive Mechanism of Depression and Conclusion

I want to conclude with one more very subtle effect. It's the effect that serotonin-enhancing medications can have on depression. If a patient were going to commit suicide, I'd be the first person to say, "For God's sake, take some medication." I want to repeat again: we are not in the business of saying who should use or who should not use these medications. We're only trying to add to the dialogue some interdisciplinary understanding.  
Evolutionists have now come to begin to think that depression actually has some adaptive features. When you think about it, it's very expensive metabolically and socially to be extremely depressed. Various scientists have offered explanations of why this brain system could suddenly have evolved. Of all of them, the one I want to mention -- because it impressed me most -- was that of an anthropologist, 2 biologists, and a psychiatrist. These researchers noted that depression is very socially and metabolically costly. They reasoned that the costs of depression are probably its benefits, that depression in itself is a clear, honest signal that something is really wrong. In fact, it's an extortionary mechanism by which one sends out the signals of real need to get social support. It also gives insight, as one of my psychologist friends says: it's a failure of denial when you're totally depressed. Indeed, mildly depressed people often make clearer assessments of themselves and others.To paraphrase Aeschylus, with this pain comes wisdom.I believe that masking depression can, at times, and under some circumstances, have serious social and genetic consequences. The classic example is that of the woman who says, "I've been on this medication for several years and I feel much better, but I'm still married to the same abusive alcoholic man." The SSRIs may chemically confine patients to bad relationships as well as hinder the ability to attract and fall in love with a better mate.  
I'm going to say it again: we are not recommending that patients who are seriously psychologically ill refrain from taking serotonin-enhancing antidepressants. Indeed, we're learning more and more about them. Sometimes people say they can contribute to suicide and clearly they can also save lives.  
What we're trying to say is that these medications affect the threshold of other biologic mechanisms and at times can jeopardize unconscious evolutionary mechanisms for mate selection, for romantic love, and for attachment.  
This creates the potential for jeopardizing a patient's personal, social, and genetic future.  
Source: http://www.medscape.org/viewarticle/482059

Your Brain On Sex | Reuniting

Let’s look at what goes on in the brain during sex and orgasm. Although you may think everything happens between your legs, the experience of orgasm actually occurs between your ears. All thoughts, feelings, and bodily sensations you have correlate with specific nerve cells being activated. Orgasm, like all experiences, is brought about by electric impulses flowing along paths of connected nerve cells. Orgasm happens when specific pleasure pathways are turned on, while your defense pathways are turned off.

All this happens by means of chemical messengers and the nerve cell receptors they bind to. These neurochemical changes take place primarily in the limbic system, a very old part of the brain with circuitry that is common to all mammals. These ancient limbic circuits control almost all bodily functions.

The limbic system's job is to keep you alive and reproducing. It does this by avoiding pain and repeating what is pleasurable. The limbic system is the seat of emotions, drives, impulses and desires – including sexual ones. It’s where you fall in and out of love…or lust. Due to the nature of the limbic system, you cannot will your feelings, emotions, falling in love, or staying in love, anymore than you can will your heart to beat, or yourself to digest a meal or sleep. The limbic system has been around for well over 100,000,000 years, lurking right beneath your large, rational neo-cortex.

Rats, apes and humans use the same neurochemicals to operate the same functions in this part of the brain. Keep in mind that scientists aren't studying rodent brains to help them with their addictions and erections! Studying animals and humans, scientists have begun to unravel the neurochemistry of lust, attachment and falling in love. Falling in love involves simultaneous activation and deactivation of discrete parts of the limbic system. For every biological event in your body, there is a biological cause. In this case, the cause is neurochemicals—and the pathways they turn on and off.

Neurochemical Commands: Your World Revolves Around Dopamine

brain's reward circuitryThe central neurochemical player behind falling in—and out—of love is dopamine. Dopamine is the principal neurochemical that activates your reward circuitry, the centerpiece of the limbic system. Your reward circuitry drives nearly all of your behaviors. In other words, most all roads lead to Rome, or to the reward circuitry, so you can assess things as "good, bad, or indifferent."

At its most basic, this circuit is activated when you engage in activities that further your survival, or the continuation of your genes. Whether it’s sex, eating, taking risks, achieving goals, or drinking water, all increase dopamine, and dopamine turns on your reward circuitry. You can think of dopamine as the "Gotta have it!" neurochemical, whatever "it" is. It’s the "craving" signal. The more dopamine you release and the more your reward circuit is activated, the more you want or crave something.

A good example is food. We get a much bigger blast of dopamine eating high-calorie foods than we do low-calorie foods. It’s why we choose chocolate cake over Brussels sprouts. Our reward circuit is programmed so that "calories equal survival." cake sliceYou’re not actually craving ice cream, or a winning lotto ticket, or even a romp in the sack. You’re craving the dopamine that is released with these activities. Dopamine is your major motivation, not the item or activity.

Dopamine is not the only neurochemical involved with reward, but it’s the one that motivates you to go afterthe reward. Dopamine governs the feelings of wanting, yet the experience of liking or enjoying something is probably due to opioids. Opioids are your brain's own morphine and endorphins. Dopamine drives us toward eating or orgasm, but the experience of the actual orgasm or eating chocolate arises from opioids goosing the reward circuit. In essence, dopamine is never satisfied.

Addiction mechanisms are extraordinarily complex, and not fully understood. Yet the one aspect they share is dopaminedysregulation. All addictive substances and activities share one thing – the ability to strongly elevate dopamine levels. Watching porn, accumulating money, gaining power over others, gambling, compulsive shopping, video games…if something really boostsyour dopamine, then it’s potentially addictive for you. Why did Martha Stewart risk everything for more money? She got a thrill from a stock market gamble. She didn’t need the money; she (thought she) needed the dopamine.

Addictive highs mimic the good feelings of the basic activities for which we're actually wired...by hijacking our reward circuitry. Only a few substances (alcohol, cocaine, etc.) have the ability jack up dopamine – that’s why they are addictive. We can also hijack it with extremely stimulating versions of natural behaviors: casinos with hot hostesses, novel porn at every click, tasty junk food filled with fat and sugar, and so forth. Dopamine especially responds to novelty and the unexpected, among natural stimuli.

Don't fall into labeling dopamine as bad. There's no such thing as a bad neurochemical or hormone, although either can become a problem when out of balance. Dopamine is absolutely necessary for your decision-making, happiness, and survival. Yet when it’s too low or too high (or when changes in its receptors alter your sensitivity), it can cause real problems. If you look at this chart you can see some behaviors and conditions associated with dopamine levels or with sensitivity to dopamine. Sensitivity equates with how many receptors a nerve cell has for dopamine.

It's true that some of the conditions listed are at extreme ends of the dopamine spectrum. Nonetheless, dopamine is involved with many aspects of mood, behavior, and perception. Even small shifts in dopamine sensitivity or levels can have profound effects on how you see the world, or your partner.

The key word on the list below is bonding. Bonding is more than a behavior. It is a mammalian program, the program that permits parenting and living in groups. When dopamine drops, you are likely to find your partner less rewarding—and your bond unravels.

Dopamine Levels (or altered sensitivity to dopamine)

Excess Deficient "Normal"
Addictions Addictions Healthy bonding
Compulsions Depression Feelings of well-being, satisfaction
Mania Anhedonia—no pleasure, world looks colorless Pleasure, reward in accomplishing tasks
Sexual fetishes Lack of ambition and drive Healthy libido
Sexual addiction Inability to bond Good feelings toward others
Unhealthy risk-taking Low libido Motivated
Aggression Erectile dysfunction Healthy risk taking
Psychosis Social anxiety disorder Sound choices
Schizophrenia ADHD or ADD Realistic expectations
Sleep disturbances, "restless legs" Parent/child bonding
Contentment with "little" things

The power of dopamine and our reward circuitry are seen in classic experiments done on rats. Consider what happens when sadistic scientists put a starving rat on one side of a grid with electric current running through it and food on the other side. The rat will not cross the pain-producing grid. Yet put a rat with an electrode planted in her reward circuitry on one side of the grid and a lever she knows will stimulate her reward circuitry on the other, and she’ll dash across the grid to tap that lever nonstop. Stimulation of her reward circuitry becomes her top priority, because it’s telling her inner compass that a big reward is just around the corner. She will ignore food, even if starving, or abandon her unweaned pups just to tap that lever until she drops.

If the rat is male, he’ll ignore a receptive female to tap it until he drops. Humans implanted with similar electrodes (decades ago) experienced a constant urge to tap their levers, as well as intense sexual arousal—but not pleasure or orgasm itself. They also reported an undercurrent of anxiety.

Despite the obvious differences between rats and humans, rats have been called "guiding flashlights" for understanding the primitive mechanisms of our own brain.

Sexually-satiated male rats take up to fifteen days to recover their full desire for sex (although they can get it up long before they are back to full steam). Meanwhile, even if they're feeling sexually sluggish, there is a reliable way to jump-start them, which we’ll get to in a moment. (Female rats also show evidence of a similar cycle in the form of predictable surges of prolactin after vigorous copulation, whether or not they become pregnant. A shadow version of this prolactin cycle has now been detected in women, and may be connected with post-sex mood swings in some women.)

Research also shows that male rats experience a reduction in testosterone receptors for up to a week within their reward circuitry. Hormones and neurochemicals dock with receptors on the nerve cells. In this case, fewer receptors mean less sensitivity to circulating testosterone. The result is that the reward circuitry pumps out less dopamine. It's like the reward circuitry's batteries are low. If this happens in females, it would also reduce their sexual desire.

Low testosterone (or decreased sensitivity to it) is associated with irritability and anger. Serotonin and endorphin levels also rise in the reward circuitry of sexually-satiated rats. Most of us have heard that these are "happy neurochemicals," but in this part of the limbic system both function to put on the brakes instead of just producing warm, fuzzy feelings.  Keep in mind that sexual dysfunction is a major side effect of taking either antidepressants that raise serotonin ornarcotics that mimic endorphins. When neurochemicals dampen your reward circuitry for a time, your relationship can suffer. See The Passion Cycle for an overview of this neurochemical cycle, and for more recent research see Men: Does Frequent Ejaculation Cause A Hangover? and Women: Does Orgasm Give You a Hangover?

Dopamine and the Coolidge Effect

Humans, like virtually all mammals, are not naturally monogamous (as in sexually exclusive), although many individuals are. This may not sound very romantic, but no mammals are sexually exclusive. (A few, such as humans, are "socially monogamous." That is, they typically  raise their offspring together.) It is therefore likely that our mating neurochemistry is set up to accomplish two goals. It encourages bonding so we co-parent.

Yet there is also a conflicting program to push us out of those bonds—at least far enough to add a novel mate. From chimps to rats, the same neurochemical events drive mammalian behaviors, and they are driving them to be promiscuous. Is it likely that Mr. and Mrs. Rodent are growing apart in their relationship? Could the excitement be gone from their marriage? Perhaps Mrs. Chimp spends too much money, or nags too much. Maybe Mr. Chimp watches too much football or doesn’t help much with housework. Not likely. Just like us, they have a subconscious program, triggered by mating, found in their limbic systems, which biology uses to urge them tire of their mates and move on to new mates.

During the week or two that the hangover from orgasm lingers, our large, rational brain proposes logical reasons to explain our relationship disharmony. Orgasm is natural…absolutely. But it may also be natural for both men and women to sour on a mate, to suddenly find a spouse unattractive, irritating, and wholly unreasonable. It may even be natural to become wholly unreasonable, and thus hasten the departure of a mate.

Now, we know that all of you are wondering about that sure-fire way to jump-start male rats' flagging libido. Perhaps you can already guess. All you have to do is introduce a new, receptive female. That may not be the answer you were hoping for…or perhaps it was!

Have you ever heard of the "Coolidge Effect?" Because that’s what we're addressing. Scientists have discovered that—after a frenzy of copulation—a male rat will lose interest in a female. BUT should a new female show up, he’ll perk up long enough to service her.1

This process of presenting novel mates to males can be continued until they practically die of exhaustion—once again proving that biology doesn’t give a rat’s…hindquarters about anything but propelling genes into the future.

The Coolidge Effect has been observed in every species tested, and not just in males. Lady rodents prefer to seduce new guys, too. The Coolidge Effect just might play a role in human affairs as well. Marnia once talked with a man who had stopped counting at 350 lovers. He said, "I really don’t understand it. I lost interest in all of them sexually so quickly—and some of those women are really beautiful, too."brussel sprouts

The Coolidge Effect is linked to your post-orgasm hangover. The reason the rat loses interest is that he’s getting a weaker and weaker dopamine surge from Partner No. 1. No dopamine surge, no interest. She is not perceived as "rewarding." The same thing happens to humans. The thrill is gone, and Partner No. 1 looks like Brussels sprouts. Now you’re primed for anything that will jack up your dopamine again. Partner No. 2 appears, and your dopamine soars. As if by magic, your blues are gone, and you have that heady feeling of anticipation, that sense of uninhibited aliveness. In short, No. 2 looks like chocolate cake. (This also has implications for understanding today's binging on Internet porn.)

Assuming we don't learn how to steer for lasting bonds by taming our limbic system, our reward circuitry will push us to do just what it evolved to do (once our temporary honeymoon neurochemistry wears off). We'll get less and less dopamine "reward" during sex with our current mate. Notice that this is similar to what occurs when people use drugs, play intense video games, binge on Internet porn, or gamble. They seek more and more stimulation to get the same high. In short, feelings of sexual satiety do not promote romance—which calls into question a lot of today's relationship advice about producing bigger, better and more frequent orgasms.

The truth has been recognized for thousands of years. Here's a poem from the ancient Greek Anthology.

Once plighted, no men would go whoring.

They'd stay with the one they adore,

If women were half as alluring

After the act as before.

Back to our tale. What if No. 2 doesn’t show up for your tryst, and you’re left in the doldrums? Unlike rats, you have many dopamine-raising possibilities—from Internet porn, gambling and alcohol, to the dopamine agonists drug companies are producing to light a fire under slumbering libidos (not recommended, due to risky side effects). These "fixes" make you feel better briefly, but as far as your well-being goes, they are like eating junk food—a net loss. As biologist Robert Sapolsky observed, there is a price for blasting our reward circuitry too enthusiastically in our efforts to counter the blues.

Unnaturally strong explosions of synthetic experience and sensation and pleasure evoke unnaturally strong degrees of habituation.... Our tragedy is that we just become hungrier." In short, there are advantages to steering for equilibrium initially, rather than always reaching for more stimulation to cope.

Your limbic system is not equipped to understand that there can be too much of a good thing. It just keeps rewarding you to do the same unrewarding things because they register as things that once served your ancestors. A "fix" just positions you for a continuous addictive cycle of highs, more lows, and a search for more highs. Many of us spend much of our sex lives caught in this cycle—with no obvious way out.

The Power of Equilibrium

happy coupleWe have talked about how roller coaster levels of dopamine can break couples apart, but there’s also something holding couples together. The neurochemical that binds couples together is oxytocin, the "cuddle hormone" or "bonding hormone." Without it, we could not stay in love. Falling in love is associated with a soup of neurochemicals—like adrenaline, which makes your heart race, and, as we have mentioned, dopamine, which makes you crave your beloved, and low serotonin, which can make you obsessed with someone. But the heartwarming, loving, "gushy" aspects of love are probably due to oxytocin.

Oxytocin has various functions in the body, such as inducing labor contractions and milk ejection, but from evolutionary biology’s perspective, its main behavioral function is to bond us to our children for life. It also serves to bond us to our mate…at least long enough to fall in love with our child so that it has two caregivers for its long childhood and adolescence. Friendships are also built on oxytocin, and can be quite deep bonds.

Yet, what happens to friendships that turn into sexual relationships? Often things change for the worse. When Harry Met SallyThis change is an excellent example of the post-sexual satiation neurochemical shift, or hangover, kicking in. Oxytocin and dopamine are the yin and yang of bonding and love. Dopamine furnishes the kick, oxytocin makes a particular mate appealing, in part by triggering feelings of comfort. You need both acting on the reward circuitry at ideal levels to stay in love. In experiments, if scientists block either oxytocin or dopamine, mothers will ignore their pups.

There's evidence that these two neurochemicals stimulate each other's release, so if one is low, it affects levels of the other. As sexual satiation plays havoc with dopamine, lovers can end up with a double-whammy effect on their precious emotional bonds. Low dopamine (or dopamine receptors) alone interferes with feelings of love, and it may reduce oxytocin levels or the brain's sensitivity to oxytocin. As things go sour, something interferes with oxytocin's bonding effects. It's likely that it's (temporary) low dopamine, or reduced sensitivity to it.

The good news is that making love while avoiding sexual satiation is the loophole in biology’s plan for our love lives. This is the secret that the ancient sacred-sexuality sages stumbled upon. Making love with lots of affection, without the dopamine-driven highs and lows of conventional sex, seems to keep neurochemical levels balanced.

There's some evidence that the more oxytocin you produce, the more receptive to it key nerve cells become. This is the opposite of dopamine. In addicts, dopamine receptors start to decrease as the nerve cells protect themselves from overstimulation. Addicts then need more and more of a drug (more and more dopamine). Luckily you don’t need an ever-increasing "fix" of oxytocin to maintain the sparkle in your romance. Daily bonding behaviors can make your partner look better and better—at least to you. This is why daily affection, with less orgasm, can strengthen your bond with your mate.

Oxytocin is associated with significant benefits, both emotionally and physically. In fact, oxytocin may be the answer to the question, "What is the mechanism by which love and affection positively affect our health?" Consider the following research:

  • Oxytocin reduces cravings. When scientists administered it to rodents who were addicted to cocaine, morphine, or heroin, the rats opted for less drugs, or showed fewer symptoms of withdrawal. (Kovacs, 1998 )
  • Oxytocin calms. A single rat injected with oxytocin has a calming effect on a cage full of anxious rats. (Agren, 2002)
  • This quality of oxytocin explains why companionship can increase longevity—even among those who are HIV positive (Young, 2004). dopamine high, followed by hangoverOr speed recovery: wounded hamsters heal twice as fast when they are paired with a sibling, rather than left in isolation (DeVries, 2004).
  • It may also explain why, among various species of primates, care-giving parents (whether male or female) live significantly longer. (Cal Tech, 1998 )
  • Oxytocin appears be a major reason that SSRI’s [Prozac-type drugs] ease depression, perhaps because high levels of cortisol are the chief culprits in depression and anxiety disorders. (Oxytocin counteracts cortisol's effects.) (Uvnas-Moberg, 1999)
  • Oxytocin increases sexual receptivity and counteracts impotence, which may be one reason why this other way of making love remains pleasurable. (Pedersen, C.A., 2002), (Arletti, 1997)

Sure enough, scientists are finally beginning to find the connections between oxytocin, regular affection and successful, long-term pair bonds:

However, do not think that spraying oxytocin up your nose, or taking sublingual tabs will in any way reproduce the bonding benefits described here and elsewhere. These effects only occur when precise amounts are released in very specific brain structures. Flooding the blood and brain with oxytocin will cause unwanted side effects and may produce counterproductive mood and perception shifts.

Again, oxytocin reduces cravings and increases sexual receptivity. This allows making love without orgasm to be surprisingly satisfying. The affection is always there, flowing between you and your partner. When we tiptoe around dopamine’s highs and lows, we encourage balance and clear perception of each other. We see each other as sources of safety and pleasure, not as sources of recurring stress with brief moments of sexual pleasure. The real magic of love happens at a neurochemical level—and we can choose balance in order to foil the extremes of our genes' plans for us.

If you would like to learn more about a way to make love that sidesteps humanity's built-in separation mechanism and makes the most of attachment (oxytocin) visit Karezza Korner.

For more on the effects of today's hyperstimulating Internet porn on the brain visit Your Brain On Porn.

  • 1.Oxytocin rises in rats' brains for hours after mating. It appears to make them engage in riskier-than-normal behavior—perhaps so that they seek new mates. (Unlike humans, they are not pair bonders.)
via Your Brain On Sex | Reuniting.  

Harold & Kumar Sure do love the Ganja...

Harold & Kumar 1 Kumar dreams about a relationship with Ganja. [youtube http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XZfS7BS2IFE&w=420&h=315] Harold & Kumar 2 Kumar has a threesome with hot chick & Ganja. Explicit: http://youtu.be/NlcAN1z8VAA

Safe Sex? Not If Your Sex Toys Aren’t Green

Tuesday, 08 November 2011 | Tonya Kay | Blog Entry You can find sex toys everywhere sensual pleasure exists or has existed—unless you live in Alabama, of course, where the last remaining US state law banning the sale of these items is still on books. Yes, outside of Alabama and India, we legally play with sex toys because we like pleasure and we don't like disease. All us good little girls (and boys) are at home having safe sex with our toys—or so we thought. We carefully picked out the color, size and ergonomics of our personal sanity device, but did we consider the materials it was made from? A Little History Sex toys have been around since the beginning of time. Not mine, specifically. But other peoples'. Like the dildo William Shakespeare mentioned in Act V, Scene 3 of The Winter's Tale (15th century). Or the Upper Paleolithic people's 20-centimeter stone phallus discovered in a cave in what is now Germany nearly 30,000 years ago. Or how about the doctors' vibrating electric tools of the late 1800s—predating the invention of the motor-driven vacuum cleaner by 10 years—said to relieve "hysteria" by massaging women's genitals until "hysterical paroxysm" was achieved. Eleven such sanity aids are on display at the Minneapolis Bakken Library and Museum of Electricity in Life. Is it just me longing for the "good old days" of healthcare right about now? Preventative maintenance covering vibrators instead of that toxic little blue pill! Phthalates in Phalluses In Canada, authorities have advised retailers to end the sale of baby teething rings and dog chew toys due to the presence of phthalates used in their manufacture. The European Union has enacted a ban on phthalates used in children's toys. And Greenpeace Netherlands and UK called upon the European Union to place a ban on all vibrators and other personal pleasure devices containing phthalates on August 8th, 2006, after the TNO (the Netherlands Organization for Applied Scientific Research) discovered that seven out of eight sex toys contained phthalates in concentrations of 24-51%. Phthalates are petroleum-derived plasticizers found in many common household items including carpeting, synthetic bedding, hair products, cosmetics, food containers and anything containing PVC, like vinyl. Phthalates are responsible for that ubersoft and squishy plastic feel we've come to enjoy in our flooring and sexy toys. Because phthalates have no atomic bond with the plastic they are mixed with, they are highly volatile and easily released into the air, groundwater and environment. If you smell perfumy odor from your new sex toy, you can bet phthalates are off-gassing. If you feel a slippery coating on your sex toy after it has sat for some time, it's the unstable phthalates breaking down. The Health Effects Phthalates, even in small quantities, appear to wreak havoc on human health. High concentrations have been linked to testes damage in rats, lowered sperm count in men, improper genital development in baby boys, premature breast development in young women and asthma in young children. In addition, there is research that points to phthalates being associated with childhood Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD), cellular resistance to insulin (a type 2 diabetes precursor), endocrine disruption and metabolic interference. Yes, this does mean there is a link between obesity and phthalates exposure. Your dildo could be making you fat. Safe Sex Toys But this is by no means anti-masturbation propaganda. I'm all for dildos—say it again! Nobody loves me like I do! I just wanna make sure even my solo sex is safe sex. So I did some research and development—and discovered we have more options than we might think. I found a pocket rocket that advertises "phthalate-free" plastic on its box. And I couldn't help but notice the array of lifelike, warmth-holding silicone dongs in all colors, shapes and sizes. Handblown glass dildos are works of art that also hold a nice iced temperature, if you are into the cold. And certainly you can always wear a condom with your old Phthalate-infused trustworthys without having to replace them at all. Of course, I wouldn't be a raw vegan renegade without including my favorite recipe: banana and coconut oil… Happy hysteria! EcoHearth: Come Home to the Earth