With high volume porn streaming so readily available to the voyeurs of the world, it's slightly archaic to stick to the mindset of "porn is negative". We ain't no bible thumpers round here, but we do keep it classy when it comes to exploring fantasy to the fullest extent or polyamorous arrangements. When choosing your mate it's imperative to be as real as you come. Otherwise, the long-term won't be pleasant or enriching. It will be straining and deflating.
One thing that should never be introduced into any sexual relationship is Shame.
Every emotion after inevitably and unfortunately will be adversarial until all is forgiven and forgotten. It's tough, the strong survive and remember all these emotions come from the place of wanting love and wanting to share your love....so be real with what you're truly needing and get it before all is lost.
The communication (sorry for the strange font size change; I screenshot and edited to post):
source
Addicted: Why Do People Get Hooked? In essence, the article traces aspects of all addictions to the dopamine system in the brain. Here is an excerpt from the article with some of my comments in parenthesis: “Imagine you are taking a slug of whiskey. a puff of a cigarette. A toke of marijuana. A snort of cocaine. A shot of heroin. Put aside whether these drugs are legal or illegal. Concentrate, for now, on the chemistry. The moment you take that slug, that puff, that toke, that snort, that shot, trillions of potent molecules surge through your bloodstream and into your brain. Once there, they set off a cascade of chemical and electrical events, a kind of neurological chain reaction that ricochets around the skull and rearranges the interior reality of the mind.” “Given the complexity of these events–and the inner workings of the mind in general–it’s not surprising that scientists have struggled mightily to make sense of the mechanisms of addiction. Why do certain substances have the power to make us feel so good (at least at first)? Why do some people fall so easily into the thrall of alcohol, cocaine, nicotine and other addictive substances, while others can, literally, take them or leave them?” “The answer, many scientists are convinced, may be simpler than anyone has dared imagine. What ties all these mood-altering drugs together, they say, is a remarkable ability to elevate levels of a common substance in the brain called dopamine. In fact, so overwhelming has evidence of the link between dopamine and drugs of abuse become that the distinction (pushed primarily by the tobacco industry and its supporters) between substances that are addictive and those that are merely habit-forming has very nearly been swept away.” (The claim that “I’m not addicted, it’s just a harmless habit,” doesn’t hold water!) “The Liggett Group, smallest of the U.S.’s Big Five cigarette makers, broke ranks in March and conceded not only that tobacco is addictive but also that the company has known it all along. While RJR Nabisco and the others continue to battle in the courts–insisting that smokers are not hooked, just exercising free choice–their denials ring increasingly hollow in the face of the growing weight of evidence. Over the past year, several scientific groups have made the case that in dopamine-rich areas of the brain, nicotine behaves remarkably like cocaine. (We also know that porn affects the brain in ways similar to cocaine.) And late last week a federal judge ruled for the first time that the Food and Drug Administration has the right to regulate tobacco as a drug and cigarettes as drug-delivery devices.” “Now, a team of researchers led by psychiatrist Dr. Nora Volkow of the Brookhaven National Laboratory in New York has published the strongest evidence to date that the surge of dopamine in addicts’ brains is what triggers a cocaine high. In last week’s edition of the journal Nature they described how powerful brain-imaging technology can be used to track the rise of dopamine and link it to feelings of euphoria.” “Like serotonin (the brain chemical affected by such antidepressants as Prozac), dopamine is a neurotransmitter–a molecule that ferries messages from one neuron within the brain to another. Serotonin is associated with feelings of sadness and well-being, dopamine with pleasure and elation. Dopamine can be elevated by a hug, a kiss, a word of praise or a winning poker hand–as well as by the potent pleasures that come from drugs.” (Porn highly elevates dopamine levels.) “The idea that a single chemical could be associated with everything from snorting cocaine and smoking tobacco to getting good grades and enjoying sex (porn viewing mimics the sex act–the brain believes it is literally having sex) has electrified scientists and changed the way they look at a wide range of dependencies, chemical and otherwise. Dopamine, they now believe, is not just a chemical that transmits pleasure signals but may, in fact, be the master molecule of addiction.” (All addictions have a commonality–feelings of pleasure and euphoria triggered by dopamine in the brain.) “This is not to say dopamine is the only chemical involved or that the deranged thought processes that mark chronic drug abuse are due to dopamine alone. The brain is subtler than that. Drugs modulate the activity of a variety of brain chemicals, each of which intersects with many others. “Drugs are like sledgehammers,” observes Dr. Eric Nestler of the Yale University School of Medicine. “They profoundly alter many pathways.” (In addition to dopamine processes, Porn alters many areas of the brain.) “For nearly a quarter-century the U.S. has been waging a war on drugs, with little apparent success. As scientists learn more about how dopamine works (and how drugs work on it), the evidence suggests that we may be fighting the wrong battle. Americans tend to think of drug addiction as a failure of character. (You just need more will-power; you’re not trying hard enough.) But this stereotype is beginning to give way to the recognition that drug dependence has a clear biological basis. “Addiction,” declares Brookhaven’s Volkow, “is a disorder of the brain no different from other forms of mental illness.” (We now know that pornography, like other chemical addictions, radically alters the brain and is a mental health issue.) “That new insight may be the dopamine hypothesis’ most important contribution in the fight against drugs. It completes the loop between the mechanism of addiction and programs for treatment. And it raises hope for more effective therapies. Abstinence, if maintained, not only halts the physical and psychological damage wrought by drugs but in large measure also reverses it.” This last sentence is the one I really want to call you attention to, because it is exactly what we are seeing with porn addiction recovery–addiction circuitry in the brain can be reversed, and healthy circuitry restored! To illustrate this fact, here is another Time Magazine article I found. This one is from 2007 and actually proves what the 1997 article claimed in regard to the addict brain returning to normal over time. Go to the following web page: http://www.time.com/time/2007/addiction/ Click on the tab “Addiction and Brain Activity.” You will notice a brain scan image showing the activity in a non-addict brain. As you move the slider to the right, a scan image shows the brain of a cocaine addict 10 days after cocaine use stops. Notice how little activity there is in the frontal lobe of the brain–the place where logic, willpower and self-control reside. Now, as you move the slider to the far right, the scan shows the addict brain 100 days after cocaine use has ceased. Look at how much the activity in the front lobes has increased! And that is after just 100 days! The wonderful news is this brain change is not just a reality with recovering cocaine addicts, but with all addictions–including pornography addiction! The porn addicted brain can be changed and healed!Read more http://prafulla.net/quick-tips/assorted-tips/pornography-addiction-in-america-infographic/
The scientific data on marijuana and libido are all over the map. But there are common sense reasons that one individual might find marijuana to be a turn-on and another might it to be a turn-off.
Marijuana and the Female Libido
When marijuana researchers refer to sexual difficulties caused by marijuana use in women, they are most likely to be referring to failures of ovulation, reduced likelihood of pregnancy even if a child is conceived (due to changes in the receptivity of the lining of the uterus to the embryo), and disruptions of the menstrual cycle. They are less likely to be referring to difficulties in achieving orgasm or loss of interest in sex.
There is some science to suggest that the endocannabinoids in marijuana may reduce genital arousal in women. Smoking marijuana has been suggested as a treatment for a condition known as persistent genital arousal disorder in women, which is most likely to occur in women who have bipolar disorder or who have suddenly stopped taking antidepressants.
But in most women genital arousal is only part of sexual stimulation. Disinhibition regarding touch may allow a woman to feel aroused along all of her erogenous zones, not just the obvious body parts such as the vagina and the breasts. Many women are stimulated on the midline of the abdomen, the nose, the indentation at the upper lip, the crown of the head, and the tip of the tongue.
Some women find that their sexual energy is too "hot" to control when they do not use marijuana or a similar calming drug. They find that their libido is manageable when they smoke pot. There are women who smoke pot prior to sex in part to feel more in charge of their lovemaking.
Is Marijuana a Negative or a Positive in Women's Sex Lives?
Despite what experts warn, many women report that their sex lives are enhanced by the occasional use of marijuana. Regular use of marijuana, on the other hand, may be a major turn-off. As one woman put it:
"When we (the woman and her husband) first tried smoking pot before making love, it made every touch an ecstatic experience. But over the two years since my husband lost his job and started just sitting around the house smoking grass all day, the very sight of him makes me nauseous."
Or as one man described his relationship, "When we're tokin', there ain't no pokin'."
The short-term effects of marijuana use on sexual enjoyment by women depend on whether dropping inhibitions are relevant to her sexual enjoyment. Not every woman needs to be disinhibited. The long-term effects of marijuana on sexual enjoyment by women are tied in to a number of factors that are not related to the biological effects of the drug, such as whether she and her partner can pay their bills.
Men, Sex, and Marijuana
Marijuana and beer have very similar effects on male testosterone levels—they both lower them. The hops used to flavor beer even contain natural 17-beta-estradiol, which can cause a condition known in Germany as "beer drinker's droop." Some men also have trouble achieving erections after smoking pot. But other men report that smoking marijuana gives them extra power in the bedroom. How can both sets of stories be true?
The simple fact is that people don't always tell sex researchers the truth about their sex lives. However, physiologists also know that a chemical in marijuana called cannabigerol can increase the force of ejaculation and the intensity of orgasm.
Cannabigerol "kicks in" several hours after the tetrahydrocannibinol (THC) in marijuana makes the smoker high and gives them the "munchies." In addition to increasing the intensity of orgasm, this chemical:
• Reduces the need for sociability. Men are less inclined to indulge in foreplay or conversation.
• Makes men less likely to act impulsively. They will be more in control of their sexual activities, but they will also be more response to rituals in their lovemaking. They will want to repeat other sexual encounters in the same way.
• Increases basal metabolic rate. Men become literally "hotter" and more energetic—after the initial effects of the drug wear off.
In a heterosexual couple, marijuana has different effects at different times for the different partners. Women become less inhibited shortly after smoking the drug. This may enable them to enjoy more whole-body stimulation (or it may be unnecessary).
While women are becoming receptive, men are simply getting stoned. Any increased sexual intensity for them occurs after the disinhibitive effects have already worn off for the female partner.
This site is not going to give anyone specific tips on how to use marijuana more effectively for lovemaking. (We don't want the US Drug Enforcement Agency taking a special interest in our work.) And actually, there are no hard and fast scientific rules concerning whose lovemaking might get a bigger boost and when.
The bottom line is that men and women react to marijuana differently. The drug can help them overcome shyness when they are first together, but it can cause them to be out of sync as they get to know each other better. When the habit of smoking marijuana begins to interfere with work, finances, residential upkeep, or personal hygiene, then it tends to be a definite turn-off to good sex.
What about other, legal aphrodisiacs?
The best aphrodisiac for both men and women is exercise. An Italian study of men taking Viagra found that getting 200 minutes of outdoor exercise a week increased erectile strength, sexual confidence, satisfaction with intercourse, and general satisfaction with life.
For women, however, the exercise that most increases interest in sex is foreplay—especially on the days nearest to the midpoint of the menstrual cycle (when a woman is most likely to get pregnant). Creative physical activities that lead to the boudoir are most likely to enhance the female partner's enjoyment of sex.
People don't get arrested for exercise. They don't have to buy it from a shady dealer. Exercise does not ruin promising careers. If marijuana has not enhanced your sex life, try something different. Physical activity can improve your health and improve your lovemaking.
source: http://www.steadyhealth.com/articles/Marijuana_and_Your_Sex_Life___Is_Marijuana_Sex_Inhibiting__Sex_Enhancing__or_Sex_Neutral__a2029.html?show_all=1
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